the one about something i love

I love writing. I used to journal all the time. Right now the time to sit down and let the words pour out through my hand onto paper seems rare. I miss it, so I've decided to make a big effort to at least blog more. I've been reading blogs for a long time and I've had a bunch. I go back and forth between how easy I want it to be to find me in real life based on what's online, so I end up closing them down after awhile. A lot of bloggers are going more and more to podcasts or vlogs which are just not the same to me. I guess that's the point, changing with the changing times. But I still think there's a solid place for blogs.

I learned how to read around the age of 4 or 5. I don't remember struggling to learn. I do remember how much I loved that it opened up the world to me in a way I had no idea existed. I could do anything because now I could just read the directions and warnings on labels. I could get lost in someone else's story. I could live in fantastic worlds or learn more about the real one I live in. I could read out loud to share with others or I could find a corner to curl up in and let myself be enveloped by a good book. Learning to read was learning the best kind of magic.

When I learned that I am good at writing, that I can paint a picture for someone else, I can explain my emotions, I fell even more in love with that than I had with leaning to read. I'm such an introvert and feel so awkward around people I don't know very well sometimes. I have such huge thought processes that for a long time it seemed like a waste to not explain how I arrived at a decision, but as I've gotten older I've learned that part doesn't matter to most people. When I can sit and write, I can go back and revise my words for clarity or realize easily that I'm sharing too much. I like having memories kept safely on paper for myself. I knew I would fail at baby books, so for both my boys, I wrote them letters about the first 12 months of their lives. I created email addresses for each of them that I send notes to now.

I love a good conversation and hearing someone's thought process. We all seem to have less and less time for this kind of thing. But maybe if I start writing again, people can comment and we can have mini conversations. I think that would be good.

The one about Jerry Springer

I found a morning radio show that I love because it's fairly unpredictable and definitely funny with a lot of really good things mixed in. Helpful thoughts, doing good deeds, stuff like that. I will spare you the background story of why he was there, but recently they had Jerry Springer on and talked to him about a few different things. And at one point, one of the djs asked him since he's been doing his show for over twenty years now, does he think humanity has gotten worse through the years? I thought it was a great question, but his answer really astounded me. He said absolutely not. The change is that we broadcast our terribleness so much more easily now through social media, but we should remember that we had a Holocaust before we had Twitter.

This has haunted me a little bit since I heard it. I can't stop thinking about it.

I got the original Broadway cast recording of Hamilton and I can't stop listening to it because strangely a story set in the late 1700s and beginning of the 1800s is so amazingly timely. I hear them sing "we're so lucky to be alive right now" and it is striking because I often think the same thing. I didn't grow up embarrassing myself on social media but I'm comfortable enough with technology to have embraced the good parts of it now. I drive all over the place for work but never hesitate to do so because of my trusty navigation app. I'm old enough to not care quite as much about what other people think and to be able to glean wisdom from both my experiences and those from people around me. I do feel lucky to be alive right now.

We had a Holocaust before we had Twitter.

I think people are terrible. But I think there is so much good and beauty and love in the world that the terribleness will never completely overtake the good. For everyone driving like a maniac and assuming they are the only one on a time crunch and they are more important, there are two or three cars I see letting people merge into their lanes and other nice things you can do in traffic. For all the uncertainty about Trump actually being our President on Friday, nonprofits have seen a dramatic increase in donations and volunteers. Even as bleak and devastating and evil as the Holocaust was, there were so many quiet heros doing everything they could in their little corner of the world to not let evil prevail.

I believe in the good. There is beauty that will rise from ashes, always.